Bad day

Yesterday was an awful day. I was excited when I woke up that the antibiotics for the bladder infection seemed to be working because I only got up once in the middle of the night to pee instead of twice. Nothing was unusual until after I ate breakfast and went to the bathroom. I wiped and saw bright red blood. No. I looked down and saw the toilet filled with streaks and streaks of blood. No. No. No. Sound familiar? Same thing happened to me last pregnancy.

Called the doctor's office at 8:00am and got in to see the doctor at 9:00am. She just did a quick exam; cervix looked the same as last time, a teensy bit open, and definitely some blood there. She said she saw a spot on my cervix, maybe a small polyp (fantastic), but didn't want to mess with my cervix at that point. An ultrasound was ordered for 10:30am.

I was so stressed. I had no cramping but of course when you see that amount of blood you immediately start thinking the worst. Andrew rescheduled his interview for a promotion (what a sweet man) to come pick me up and take me to the u/s. Everything was perfect with the baby. I'll try to post the u/s pics later. HB at 164. It was even measuring two days ahead, where I should be according to my LMP, which seems impossible because I know when I ovulated and even if I implanted early the first pregnancy test I took would have been positive instead of negative...but whatever. I've heard that an u/s is really only accurate within a week, give or take.

Anyway, I got a call back later about my results and I have a subchorionic hematoma. Great. Could I possibly have any more risk factors for miscarriage? I had to ask the nurse a bunch of questions because she didn't explain what it was at all. Even her answers weren't helpful. I've seen posts about it on BBC but haven't really paid attention to them.

Of course, I resorted to the internet. I am thoroughly freaked out now. A majority of the time they resolve themselves but if they're big enough they can cause placental abruption and miscarriage. Here is yet another contribution to potential bed rest. I wish that financially Andrew and I were stable enough for me to stay home all day. I would gladly go on bed rest today to make sure the baby is safe, but I can't. I'm starting to look into short term disability leave and any other types of leave but I'm not sure if I will qualify for any sort of paid leave. Unpaid, sure, but paid is looking like a slim possibility.

I was told they were going to send a report to the OB I'm seeing on Thursday about the cerclage. Hopefully we can get more answers then. Is it big/small? Will it play a factor in the cerclage procedure? I sure hope not. Agh, this is all so stressful!

In other, somewhat related news, Andrew and I are sort of trying to break our lease. See, we renewed our current lease for another year before we found out we were pregnant. A big part of me was thinking we wouldn't get pregnant right away anyway. Well, I started thinking more and more about getting the cerclage and bed rest. Well, for one, we have no air conditioning. If/when I go on bed rest it will be during the summer, and even if we got a portable air conditioner I wouldn't be able to get up to add water to it every 4 hours or whatever. If we went for window air then we would have to buy a casement air conditioner because of our windows and those are expensive. No matter what, we would have to spend at least $500 to get something that will at least cool the air by 10-20 degrees. Then I started thinking of the stairs because the other two bedrooms (one of which would have to be the baby's room) are upstairs. During later pregnancy I wouldn't be able to set up the baby's room at all, especially if I'm on bedrest, and then we would either have to move the air conditioner upstairs or just get another one.

Anyway, we are trying to see if they will let us move to another one of their properties July 1st, when our lease is up, and just transfer or let us sign a new lease for the new property. We want to stay with them because we like them and we hope they have sympathy with our situation. They have a nice tri-level (less stairs at least) with central air, plus it has a basement and family room (as opposed to just our one living room) and the neighborhood has pool access, all for $100 cheaper a month than where we are at. That makes no sense but we're hoping that after explaining the situation, the fact that we want to stay with them, and that the house is of a comparable price, they will let us go through with it. We don't want to move again until we can afford to buy our own house so this place would be perfect! I emailed them last Friday and have yet to hear anything back. Crossing my fingers we hear good news though I had a dream last night that they said there was nothing they could do for us. I hope that is not a sign of things to come!