Exciting News

Of course I had a horrible time sleeping last night. All I could think about was when I could POAS and if AF was going to show up this morning. I've been waking up pretty consistently in the middle of the night to pee lately so at 2:50am I decided to get up because I couldn't hold it anymore and I tested. Faint positive. I still wasn't sure I 100% believed it and thought AF could still show up.

After 20 minutes or so I still could not fall back asleep so I decided to take my temp just in case. It was still up! About 0.5 degrees up from the previous day. I did end up falling back asleep and temped again before I got up at 6:00am and it was another 0.5 up...probably thrown off a little from not getting much sleep. When my temp goes down on the morning of AF it's around 97.05. These were temps of 98.55 and 98.62. Not likely to be up that high just from getting up. I've woken up to pee at 4:00am before and still temped at 5:30 and had pretty normal temps. This is the real deal!

I decided to POAS again with two different kind of tests. I was hoping they would be darker but 3 hours really isn't that much time to concentrate your urine! Still, they were both faintly positive. I'm going to test again on Sunday just to see a darker line.

So yeah. I got my BFP! I couldn't be more thrilled. I couldn't be more terrified. Funny how opposite states can exist as one for a baby loss mom. I have the exact same due date as Holden since I O'd on exactly the same date. Part of me is terrified with this. I'm going to be so worried in November, wondering if I'm going to add another angel baby to this month. The other part is so excited and feels like it will honor the memory of Holden. Maybe it's good luck! I hope this time I get my May baby. My May rainbow.